Men are not Women, Relatively Speaking

Our problem is one of comparison

"Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid." - Attributed to Albert Einstein but origins unknown

Women are from Venus, men are from Mars may help us understand the differences between the sexes, but until we understand that we (both man and woman) are made in the image of God, we will never understand what makes us the same. If we continue to judge males and females in relationship to each other, we will be in perpetuity subjected to earthly comparisons proffered by soothe sayers, charlatans and Substack authors. Worse yet, we will be subjected to the relative comparisons fancied by those who are credentialed to "know" the difference.

We live in a world divided. Politicians seek to divide us by race, religion and region. Government policy separates us into oppressed and oppressors, putting their administrative thumb on the merit scale to punish the former to reward the latter. But nowhere has the nefarious forces that seek to divide us been more successful than in the arena of sexual division. President Trump just defeated VP Harris and, the Amish of Lancaster County PA aside, the vote results ultimately came down to men vs. women.

Trump also poled a greater percentage of men in the minority demographics of Black, Asian and Hispanic ethnic groups then he did in prior elections and Harris poled a higher female percentage among the suburban educated class. So concerned that this past election was sizing up to be a battle of the sexes, that former President and Michelle Obama specifically campaigned to black men and women. President Obama told men at a Pennsylvania rally. “And you are thinking about sitting out?” he said. “Part of it makes me think — and I'm speaking to men directly — part of it makes me think that, well, you just aren't feeling the idea of having a woman as president, and you're coming up with other alternatives and other reasons for that.” At the same time at a separate rally in Michigan former First Lady Michelle Obama told women, “If you are a woman who lives in a household of men that don’t listen to you or value your opinion, just remember that your vote is a private matter…You get to use your judgment and cast your vote for yourself and the women in your life. Remember, women standing up for what is best for us can make the difference in this election.” Celebrities also jumped on the gender splitting band wagon like Julia Roberts, who issued this PSA, reminding women that what happens in the voting booth stays in the voting booth. Because of the two genders of the presidential candidates and the ultimate voting split by gender, I believe history will dub the election of '24 as a battle of the sexes. But this battle did not start here.

Thanks to those whose power is derived by highlighting what divides us, the buildup of the sexual division has been growing. Here on Substack, girl boss writers flood the zone daily with articles about how adjusting towards feminine management styles will save our lagging companies and floundering country. Dudes write lengthy screeds telling men that they have a Biblical responsibility to be “the man of the house,” and, by the way, make sure you take your daily male vitality stack! I am one such Substack author who jumped into this gender splitting fray with this recent post, The Men in My Neighborhood. But what really tripped me up this time was a LinkedIn post about women in business. I don't wish to out the author, but the entire article was a comparison of women advancements in the workplace as compared to men. And, like my opening salvo of the fish climbing a tree, if we stay stuck in the mire of merely comparing one gender to the other, we will never, as creatures, have the capacity to compare ourselves, with humility and reverence, to our Creator.

In fact, if one truly digs into the girl boss vs. masculine dude battle of words, both sides only make their arguments in relation to the opposite sex. Women run businesses are discussed in relationship to men run businesses. Masculine ideals are compared to feminine traits. Each side only makes their arguments for why masculine or feminine traits are superior and how the world would be in proper order if the other side would just know their place and step in line with the author’s overgeneralized notion of ideal masculine or feminine gender roles.

Here is the rub, we were not made in the image of a man or a woman, we were made in the image of God. God made us man and woman in God's image, not a masculine or a feminine image, but a God image. Perhaps it is time we start writing articles about our collective relationship to God and ditch our relative comparisons to each other. There is no other way we overcome the nefarious divisive seeds of race, religion and region that are sowed to control us. Most importantly, until the relative comparisons of the genders end, men and women cannot act as one in showing love for one another and compare themselves collectively toward the One in whose image they were made. God created us man and woman so that we may see each other. Only when masculinity and femininity come together as one, can we truly see God and experience the Beauty of God’s non-divisive Divine design.